Help dealing with a strange Person

[Andrea]

Hi!
I have been very busy and haven't been able to post as much, although I have been checking in. Well, after my birthday I broke down and talked to my father about the situation and he is going to help us get our OWN house. Things seem to be looking up and I found a house I love in the same school district (my kids started their new school this week). I am really feeling as if things may have happened for the best.
I have a questions though:
1) SOmetimes when I share things with people I feel like they (I can't say who yet, but someone close to me) wish negative things to happen, and things fall apart. Should I just not share whats happening with anyone until its a done deal? Is there a special mind set I can use to prevent others negativity from influencing me? I know thinking the way I do is the first mistake, but I only think this way because I have seen it happen so many times. Its like the "evil eye" post that was spoken on last week.

Before I go I have to again thank all of you who spoke so many positive things into my life and made me feel so much better and helped me get through a scary time. I am truly grateful.

[PurpleParrot]

Hey guys, Mind if I chime in here? I dealt with people differently who have been giving me difficulties the past few months.I used to just sit and take insults and trouble myself with them and then be overwhelmingly nice to everyone but I'm realizing something else and another way to deal.
I dont know what I'm saying is best at all to say or good advice and I'm not as experienced in this at all but I'm learning and I'm feeling like I could relate.Forgive me if you might sense something not good about me as I'm healing my self so no one's going to see a perfect side or pretty me these days.
I'm trying to clear up my life as well.

First of all, one must find whats best for them to deal with their lives--the best techniques and tools and perspectives, forms of communication or lack of..and knowing when to do these things at the right time. :o)

You know what to trust.

This might sound harsh or extreme but I feel I've got to move on and I feel I'm doing whats best for me and my life at this point in time.
I am cutting out ties with people who either don't understand me and either never will or dont know how to deal with me or them when we're with each other, misunderstand themselves and cannot cope with their reality,people who like to push boundaries and limits with others(get a reaction),people who play games, people who misuse information that is told to them, people who harass others for fun,people who are a nuisance and may drain me or take advantage of me like this, people who lie about themselves and then mistrust others...the list is as is,etc.

I do not want to label everyone who I have dealt with as that...because I can see they can be great people though they might be difficult for me at the time I'm dealing with them.

The thing is, I'm learning how to deal with myself first and foremost and everyone who are with me a lot better than before and how to see through their reality a lot better as well. Ultimately, no one is that horrible no matter what was done.

I dont like to fight and I hate to show negative sides of myself to everyone but I found if I dont, then I might be telling them something false about me and I need to be honest with me..I thought I was honest and I thought I could change my reality in other ways..but to change it, you have to be honest with who you are and what you love.

I also get entangled with why I attract certain people in my life and question am I like them..it was trying for me to discern who I am among those who have harassed others.

I'm not afraid these days to tell others off but I hate showing a bellicose aspect of me.
It needs to be done to a degree. sometimes you can be silent and ignore the person because you won't feed the problem anymore...but sometimes if you're silent and thinking about it..it might not work...or if you're plainly silent it may or may not work. Try not to think about this person but try to think about you and your family and whats imoprtant. Don't let yourself be scattered by them.

Its good to distance yourself from the person who is harassing you so you can take a look at yourself,center yourself, ground you and know what is you and what is not you.

Distancing yourself shouldn't be seen as running away from everyone and running away from you..you're doing whats best for you..you're asserting yourself, your rights, your needs, your privileges , your obligation to who you are...you're not letting anyone drain you, you're not letting anyone take advantage or have an advantage over you, not allowing others to manipulate you, not getting certain types of attention or energy, not hurting others..and you're letting people know where youstand with them and what your boundaries are.

also dont worry about everyone else's lives..in times like these..it can get taxing on one's soul.


sometimes if someone's threatening you...it might suck..but you might want to level with them and drive it through them in a way that they understand--that they can't do this..like leveling the playing field..but you shouldn't be caught in their traps or their games.

i never liked playing games, or confronting people or telling them off..its something that disgusts my being...
..you just know where you stand..and you can see through the reality...

if you can't resolve it with this person, its okay to move on from them especially if this is constant harassment.
i dont know what else to say..what i wrote may not be as clear or centered.

sometimes I think resolving something difficult like this with another person resolves an inner difficulty or conflict within yourself. :o)

Hope I did something good..if not..its just written here for whatever its worth.


you'll find what you want.

dont worry about the evil eye and its good not to tell people certain things about you.

[Astrojewels]

Andrea,
I have also been incredibly busy these past few days, great news about your dad and finding a house in the same area, it is quite incredible when you allow your energy to flow with a neutral force, wouldn’t you say? I applaud you for your belief in self.
This is a great question you ask, and just recently I had a situation that fits that question. During my life I must say I have shared my dreams with others and the negative input that I received would sometimes make that dream not eventuate, yes I can blame the other person, but I must take responsibility in that shared energy because my faith in that person to give me support really was a quest to myself and the realization that I need to support myself before anyone else would.
Personally I find anything that money can buy should not be shared or you absorb energy from people that are not achieving their wants. I don’t really believe it is their intention for you not to get it, it is more the disappointment in their own self for not getting what they want.
I had a ‘new car’ on my goal list for 2007, did not know how I was going to do that or when, but it was something I wanted. So a model caught my eye about a month ago, everything that I wanted in a car, so I took my hubby shopping and we decided yes it was perfect, and the process of receiving the car was going to take a week, so I told him not to tell anyone, we did not even tell our girls. I must say that the whole thing went incredibly smooth, no drama, no obstacles, nothing. The car was even ready two days before the dealer said it would be. everyone was very shocked when they seen it and I had a few comments on what others did not like, but hey it is my choice and I am the one driving it and it is brand new, never had a brand new car so I am totally over the moon with it.
A few years ago we installed a pool, shared that event with everyone and it would take me a month of Sundays to tell you the drama that went with it! so I would say keep your secrets secret, just do it as a test and you will be amazed how things run without drama and if you do not get it, you were not supposed too.
I am so happy for you and that things are working out.