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Self-help 'makes you feel worse'
#1
BBC News

Bridget Jones is not alone in turning to self-help mantras to boost her spirits, but a study warns they may have the opposite effect.

Canadian researchers found those with low self-esteem actually felt worse after repeating positive statements about themselves.

They said phrases such as "I am a lovable person" only helped people with high self-esteem.

The study appears in the journal Psychological Science.

A UK psychologist said people based their feelings about themselves on real evidence from their lives.

The suggestion people should "help themselves" to feel better was first mooted by Victorian Samuel Smiles 150 years ago.   

His book, called simply "Self Help", sold a quarter of a million copies and included guidance such as: "Heaven helps those who help themselves".

Self-help is now a multi-billion pound global industry.

'Contradictory thoughts'

The researchers, from the University of Waterloo and the University of New Brunswick, asked people with high and low self-esteem to say "I am a lovable person."

They then measured the participants' moods and their feelings about themselves.

In the low self-esteem group, those who repeated the mantra felt worse afterwards compared with others who did not.

However people with high self-esteem felt better after repeating the positive self-statement - but only slightly.

The psychologists then asked the study participants to list negative and positive thoughts about themselves.

They found that, paradoxically, those with low self-esteem were in a better mood when they were allowed to have negative thoughts than when they were asked to focus exclusively on affirmative thoughts.

Writing in the journal, the researchers suggest that, like overly positive praise, unreasonably positive self-statements, such as "I accept myself completely," can provoke contradictory thoughts in individuals with low self-esteem.

Such negative thoughts can overwhelm the positive thoughts.

If people are instructed to focus exclusively on positive thoughts, negative thoughts might be especially discouraging.

Real life

The researchers, led by psychologist Joanne Wood, said: "Repeating positive self-statements may benefit certain people, such as individuals with high self-esteem, but backfire for the very people who need them the most."

However, they say positive thinking can help when it is part of a broader programme of therapy.

Simon Delsthorpe, a psychologist with Bradford District Care Trust and spokesman for the British Psychological Society, said self-esteem was based on a range of real life factors, and that counselling to build confidence - rather than telling yourself things are better than they are - was the solution.

"These are things like, do you have close family relationships, a wide network of friends, employment and appearance.

"If you're not close to your parents, don't have many friends, are unemployed and are unhappy with your appearance, it might be hard to have high self-esteem.

"But if your experience is the reverse of that it would be much easier to say 'I'm OK' and believe that."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8132857.stm
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#2
BBC News

Bridget Jones is not alone in turning to self-help mantras to boost her spirits, but a study warns they may have the opposite effect.

Canadian researchers found those with low self-esteem actually felt worse after repeating positive statements about themselves.

They said phrases such as "I am a lovable person" only helped people with high self-esteem.

The study appears in the journal Psychological Science.

A UK psychologist said people based their feelings about themselves on real evidence from their lives.

The suggestion people should "help themselves" to feel better was first mooted by Victorian Samuel Smiles 150 years ago.   

His book, called simply "Self Help", sold a quarter of a million copies and included guidance such as: "Heaven helps those who help themselves".

Self-help is now a multi-billion pound global industry.

'Contradictory thoughts'

The researchers, from the University of Waterloo and the University of New Brunswick, asked people with high and low self-esteem to say "I am a lovable person."

They then measured the participants' moods and their feelings about themselves.

In the low self-esteem group, those who repeated the mantra felt worse afterwards compared with others who did not.

However people with high self-esteem felt better after repeating the positive self-statement - but only slightly.

The psychologists then asked the study participants to list negative and positive thoughts about themselves.

They found that, paradoxically, those with low self-esteem were in a better mood when they were allowed to have negative thoughts than when they were asked to focus exclusively on affirmative thoughts.

Writing in the journal, the researchers suggest that, like overly positive praise, unreasonably positive self-statements, such as "I accept myself completely," can provoke contradictory thoughts in individuals with low self-esteem.

Such negative thoughts can overwhelm the positive thoughts.

If people are instructed to focus exclusively on positive thoughts, negative thoughts might be especially discouraging.

Real life

The researchers, led by psychologist Joanne Wood, said: "Repeating positive self-statements may benefit certain people, such as individuals with high self-esteem, but backfire for the very people who need them the most."

However, they say positive thinking can help when it is part of a broader programme of therapy.

Simon Delsthorpe, a psychologist with Bradford District Care Trust and spokesman for the British Psychological Society, said self-esteem was based on a range of real life factors, and that counselling to build confidence - rather than telling yourself things are better than they are - was the solution.

"These are things like, do you have close family relationships, a wide network of friends, employment and appearance.

"If you're not close to your parents, don't have many friends, are unemployed and are unhappy with your appearance, it might be hard to have high self-esteem.

"But if your experience is the reverse of that it would be much easier to say 'I'm OK' and believe that."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/8132857.stm
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#3
This is an interesting study Richard, and I do agree for the most, a person with low self esteem can not talk their way out of it, yet I think that the self help books are not really about the statements that one might be asked to focus on, it is more about the whole philosophy of the person sending the message.

To raise your self esteem, I think you actually do have to focus on the truth of your personality, and take control of it, so the areas where you are unhappy, you have to take responsibility for putting yourself there in the first place, even if it was not a conscious journey.

The truth is that 90% of people that have low self worth actually do not believe it, because if you agree with them, they will then become defensive.
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#4
This is an interesting study Richard, and I do agree for the most, a person with low self esteem can not talk their way out of it, yet I think that the self help books are not really about the statements that one might be asked to focus on, it is more about the whole philosophy of the person sending the message.

To raise your self esteem, I think you actually do have to focus on the truth of your personality, and take control of it, so the areas where you are unhappy, you have to take responsibility for putting yourself there in the first place, even if it was not a conscious journey.

The truth is that 90% of people that have low self worth actually do not believe it, because if you agree with them, they will then become defensive.
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#5
I can see how this would be true. If you don't believe you are a lovable person, then repeating that you are a loveable person only provides a reason for you to prove your initial thought right. "If I was a lovable person then my husband wouldn't have left me. If I was a lovable person then I wouldn't need this book.....
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#6
I can see how this would be true. If you don't believe you are a lovable person, then repeating that you are a loveable person only provides a reason for you to prove your initial thought right. "If I was a lovable person then my husband wouldn't have left me. If I was a lovable person then I wouldn't need this book.....
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#7
Yes Spottedowl,

I think the self-help books do help as they offer positive advice and will help you begin motivation for change, you can not convince yourself just through a mere sentence that you are worthy of something, to truly send messages to the universe for action, it is a little more detailed than that.   
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#8
Yes Spottedowl,

I think the self-help books do help as they offer positive advice and will help you begin motivation for change, you can not convince yourself just through a mere sentence that you are worthy of something, to truly send messages to the universe for action, it is a little more detailed than that.   
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#9
My experience with affirmations is that they make me feel more depressed because they make me that much more aware of the negative. My mind cannot get pass the contradictory thoughts.

But I agree with Astrojewels that self-help book must have positive advice, so they are not completely unhelpful.

I believe though that constructive affirmations are better when they come from other people. I would imagine groups like Alcoholic Anonymous give positive comments to one another as a form of therapy.
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#10
My experience with affirmations is that they make me feel more depressed because they make me that much more aware of the negative. My mind cannot get pass the contradictory thoughts.

But I agree with Astrojewels that self-help book must have positive advice, so they are not completely unhelpful.

I believe though that constructive affirmations are better when they come from other people. I would imagine groups like Alcoholic Anonymous give positive comments to one another as a form of therapy.
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