HeadSpace..Deprogramming diary

[HeadSpace]

Before I went to bed last night I viewed swords from different cultures and I found some viking ones..I really like them:) After a while I got more strong and I went into one of those on edge modes. I have those, sometimes I may be a heavy eascapist and sometimes a complete maniac unable to sit down and acting like a military person:P That worked yesterday though as it was needed. But today when I woke up I noticed something was different, I've slipped into an alter or a subalter. Someone/thing tells me it is a subalter. Extreme energy, and I sort of talk 15 times faster than normal.. Also have a lot less tension around people. Unable to take things seriously. Lacking emotions.

icon_afraid


I feel it is also connected to my psychedelic days where I could sit around for days on end devouring information..That sort of fits too as I just got my new delivery from expansionsicon_biggrin

Got me thinking, if I put all of these compartments together I must be one hell of a personicon_lol

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Ok, I just asked the golden winged lion to help me center myself and I did the brown merger, which went surprisingly well after being blocked from visualizing for a while:)
So, now I'm almost back to normal..whatever that is.

I liked this before actually, with friends for example, being very nervous and tense I could hit some drugs or something and I could change personality..Suddenly a completely upbeat very relaxed guy, and perhaps even cockyicon_razz

Dont take this post to seriously..

[Astrojewels]

Before you were born, your soul personality was up for the challenge of what you are dealing with, the internal programming that exists within is not just from this current life, it is the extension of energy that you have absorbed during all your life-streams.

You have to realize that you could not have been programmed in this way if you did not have all the attributes to do so, and you did not re-enter life to just be a victim, or you would not be trying so hard to find answers and solutions!

Every person that exists has a multitude of personality compartments; it is necessary just to exist. When we do take a substance that creates an altered state, it is during this time that you would have been downloaded the most, it is also during this altered state that the lower astral can enter your electromagnetic field, so your ‘high’ depends on the personality of the moment, and how you choose to take the drug, either by pill, injection, liquid, inhaling, all these methods produce a ‘thought pattern’ of reaction and ability for downloading.  

Everything in life has a meaning to what you internally search for.

[HeadSpace]

I know I am not here to be a victim, I knew that all along. Something always kind of showed me a very strict, hard and long life in the future..That may sound weird. Stewart mentioned that the incarnation was to remove all vicitm mindpatterns too. I agree. And I do have the aries north node:) I know that quite well.

Also, I was reading the hyperspace helper earlier and I found something about "captured souls" and I got a strange feeling this might have something to do with me:?
I'm not sure though, that weird dream might have something to do with it.

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I wrote this last night. I just didn't post it until now:)

[Astrojewels]

I also have Aries north node, it takes many years to develop the true intention of this node.

[HeadSpace]

I also have something in the chart regarding the galactic center, I was told it was sun conjunct the galactic center:P That and a black hole..

For me this north node is very clear and I know what it means to me and what I am supposed to do. But I seem to forget a lot:?

A little off topic, I saw the dna, galactic history and you last night and while watching the people do the dna exercises (I did not do them) I was shown a green triangle, a red line, and perhaps a blue square..Or maybe it was brown, I wasn't quite sure.

Does anyone know what this might mean ? I didn't finish the dvd so it might be in there, but it got pretty late..

While drawing a brwon merger I also had a bunch of viking thoughts appear and I sort of found out more about someone in this life that was there too:) I think..

The merger turned out without me knowing it like very vikingish art:P And I could see myself in it:) I also recognized that I had a lot of that as a kid in school. I sort of saw it shine through the drawings.. That was cool:D

[HeadSpace]

I started a dream journal again and the first morning I got about two pages:) Funny how the memories pop up after another. I think I had a lion dream last night, I felt it was a healing dream. I wrote some of it down but a lot got lost too.

Some days ago I woke up in the middle of the night from something and I was not quite in the body, I was the bed and the entire room I was in:? floating..or melting.
I've experienced it before, and with psychedelics. I did focus and get myself in the body and grounded me. So it was alright. A little strange though.


And I had a salt bath last night too, almost:P I dont have a bathtub but I managed to get most of myself soakedicon_lol

It was wonderful, slightly erotic at first thoughicon_razz But when I got used to it I got really calm and peaceful. I could break through a lot of barriers.

When I got out of it I felt my aura all over the placeicon_megagrin I coud feel the surroundings as if it were me..Or simply more of that kind of thing. I had that before too.

And I noticed I was a lot clearer, the connection to oversoul becomes much clearer. I released a great deal and I felt the difference:)

I'm really grateful for the salt, I actually sell that stuff. Fun to be able to spread the joy:D

[Mercy Now]

HeadSpace, What do you mean by you "felt your aura all over the place"? 

[HeadSpace]

Awareness outside of the body, feeling.
It seems to be harder to describe than I thought:?

I was much more conscious of it.

[Mercy Now]

Consciousness and the human aura are different things. I'm just curious as to what you were describing. A huge aura would indicate imbalance.Auras,as I understand, are healthiest at between 1-8 ft from the body.  Was the room small?

[HeadSpace]

The room was small, but I did feel it after I left the room too:)
I may be imbalanced, other times when my programming were running high I could feel a lot of weird stuff.

I guess I am slightly sensitive. Lately, I've noticed that I am very sensitive to the projections of others. Or that I notice them as they hit me:? That can be very annoying. I found myself in some old places today spawned by me making a post regarding psychedelics here on the forum, and I am sort of still there, but it is fading.

I think I shook of some lower astral stuff earlier too.