HeadSpace..Deprogramming diary

[HeadSpace]

Just had some very sad sabotage. I don't know how to describe it.
Confusion right now, it's not natural.

Sometimes, this weird thought arises, when something good happens for instance.. Then, the thought of erasing it comes..It is forced, compulsive. Not mine. It cant be mine. I had doubts writing this, or something. Then a symbolic jolt in the bones.

Unpleasant vibes from astral today.

I have had moments of peace and progress today, and moments of really intense harassment from astral.

I might also be sitting way too much in front of the computer..Not that I'm on it all the time but I need to let go of the way I've been using it..

I see I need to start being more active.
I guess the orgone will help out with the computers and that stuff.

I have this weird uncomfortable feeling on the top of my head..And manipulation.

I see a lot of my lines start with "I", my chart from astro.com said that would be the case..

Sleep is approaching, will be nice after this day.

Just so intense sabotage today:?

[HeadSpace]

Had the most nightmarish dream I've had in ages. I was running down a street where people where fighting with katanas. I had one and fought with the people there.

I also sort of sacrificed myself when a friend got shot at, but he was shot first and the thought of it being stupid to go in the crossfire struck me:? I did go, and then attacked the one shooting. I also talked to a friend of mine about islam, and that the god weren't necessarily the one, but one in astral. A name came up, but I cant see how that has anything to do with islam. Then out the window across the street I saw on the wall or on the windows of a top floor office or something on a white poster..You went too far, regards the moon. And then a creepy song played..I woke up then.

There is someone close which have been manipulating me threw the entire sleep I think. It hurts on the head. It's messing now too.

I think I need help. I woke up with a lot of weird thoughts, not mine but things got overwhelming. Theme was to give up and die:?

It's like balancing a needle sometimes, have been.
They/it threat every single moment.

Sorry if this sounds like complaining again.

I always land on my feet.

[HeadSpace]

Had the most nightmarish dream I've had in ages. I was running down a street where people where fighting with katanas. I had one and fought with the people there.

I also sort of sacrificed myself when a friend got shot at, but he was shot first and the thought of it being stupid to go in the crossfire struck me:? I did go, and then attacked the one shooting. I also talked to a friend of mine about islam, and that the god weren't necessarily the one, but one in astral. A name came up, but I cant see how that has anything to do with islam. Then out the window across the street I saw on the wall or on the windows of a top floor office or something on a white poster..You went too far, regards the moon. And then a creepy song played..I woke up then.

There is someone close which have been manipulating me threw the entire sleep I think. It hurts on the head. It's messing now too.

I think I need help. I woke up with a lot of weird thoughts, not mine but things got overwhelming. Theme was to give up and die:?

It's like balancing a needle sometimes, have been.
They/it threat every single moment.

Sorry if this sounds like complaining again.

I always land on my feet.

[HeadSpace]

I know it may sound strange but if anyone has any advice on how to deal with the creatures and astral I would appreciate it..

[HeadSpace]

I've had a lot of stuff going on these last days, good and bad.
Today I reconnected to my oversoul and I've used some archetypes and found tremendous healing power:)

And I have managed to deal with entities on my own through colors and archetypes too. That is good:)

I will continue to work and I look forward to taking back my life.

The attachment is manipulating me at this moment and have been today, I will work on that too. I am:)
--

Just did some violet and that helps, I love violet:D
I will also print out the archetype and symbols I use and need so that I can stop sitting by the computer so much.
And I've ordered rose quartz,citrine,amethyst and some other small stones I found interesting. I will use the citrine for charging the other ones, and I will place the rose quartz in the bedroom I think.

I slept with an amethyst some nights, and one night while cleansing it with intention it helped me immensely so it got me interested in crystals.

I also do like citrine but it may be something of a trap.. I feel a sort of pull towards it as I have done before with other things I think..

A bottle of frankincense oil came along with the crystals, not etheric..whatever that is anyway:? I think it is supposed to be used for burning or incense. I have one of those burners so that might fit..They just seemed to go together, the oil and the crystals..I will try the etheric ones too:)

Fun when things work out:)

[HeadSpace]

Hey:)

I was wondering about the use of the umbrella of protection archetype/symbol, where to place it and so on. I guess it is to be placed over whatever it is to protect.

And the symbol/archetype for balancing the physical & astral. I thought that might be useful.

I found I really love the hyperspace work:D It's wonderful and very fun.

[HeadSpace]

Here's a picture I thought I'd use as a front of a book I am putting together with all the hyperspace symbols and archetypes I think I'll need for a good while:) I thought this was a great idea so I wont have to sit in front of the computer to do the exercises. That's not healthy. I can take the book with me everywhere and in the forest:D That's cool.

I found this norwegian site that puts images into real books.

I did notice the merger got a little edgy, that's annoying.

I am fairly pleased with it..It did give me a very good vibe at one point. I think it was the lion archetype. I was having some issues again with astral. And that smiled at me:)

Edit..It seems I cant actually get the picture up after all:P Probably a reason for that.

Edit2:

One thing that annoys me is that there is heavy counteraction when I do heal, even physically. Quite intense.

[HeadSpace]

I just had a an attack, I was writing a post here about an idea I had and I mentioned the attachment then it gave me a jolt because of something I thought about writing. i was actually manipulated into thinking that thought in the first place:? Then buzzing and more stuff started. And everything started get confusing and stuff. I tried the violet but i got blocked, then I managed to do MC's tip about the ears and then I put my entire head in violet. Everything calmed down:)

I have been through a lot this year, a lot. And it's been pretty crazy. My whole life has been a little intense actually.

Except my childhood. But that's a different story.

I did experiment sexually quite young actually, I didn't mention that.. And I sensed a deceiving nature in myself at one point. I think I remember a strange sensation sometimes, probably from the solar plexus. I think so.

Not sure I mentioned this earlier but at one point last year around april I think.
I was in bed while an entity came and did stuff to me sexually, I was half a sleep and didn't quite think about it. It felt interesting at first, an electric feeling around the valuables and the surrounding area, then i felt it in the root chakra, it moved up in a burning sensation and it stopped in my solar plexus. That's when I came to my senses. It got uncomfortable and felt dangerous. Then afterwards I got up, i felt as if I  was wrecked. Could barely walk. I sat down and tried to eat some fruit, but I threw up..

This was a weird experience.

I am glad I am moving on:)

The idea I mentioned was tattooing the templates called peace and god is here in hyperspace healer. I really love them, and they work in brown which is available as the less unhealthy pigment..

That's something I would love to have with me for the rest of my life:)

[HeadSpace]

I was wondering if anyone knows what other frequencies and archetypes there are in the nonhuman communication dvd than the ones posted here on the warrior section:)

Would love to know, I was thinking of buying this but if there's not any other of those frequencies i dont think I'll need it.

[HeadSpace]

I menitoned earlier that I was considering tattooing the aleph, bet and gimel. I printed those out on a note a week ago with the letters in royal blue on violet background. When I hold them on the forehead i sense effects, and yesterday while in bed I was having a troublesome day with attacks and stuff I held it on my neck. There the effects really got strong:)

So I was wondering if I were to tattoo those letters, which color would be best. I would actually prefer brown or black since the black lasts longer and I have a feeling these colors are not as toxic. But what would be the best color except for gold which probable requires a lot of different pigments..

Would really appreciate advice:)

Edit:

And the order of the letters, I wonder if it should be from left to right or in the way they correspond with the hemispheres?